Decoding What People Say

Dictionary for Decoding Women's Personal Ads

Ø 40-ish..................................49.

Ø Adventurous..........................Slept with everyone.

Ø Athletic................................No breasts.

Ø Average looking.....................Moooo.

Ø Beautiful..............................Pathological liar.

Ø Emotionally Secure..................On medication.

Ø Feminist...............................Fat.

Ø Free Spirit.............................Junkie.

Ø Friendship first.................... ...Former Slut.

Ø New-Age..............................Body hair in the wrong places.

Ø Old-fashioned........................No B.J.'s

Ø Open-minded.........................Desperate.

Ø Outgoing..............................Loud and embarrassing.

Ø Professional...........................Bitch .

Ø Voluptuous...........................Very fat.

Ø Large frame...........................Hugely fat .

Ø Wants soul mate.....................Stalker.


Dictionary for Decoding Women's English:


Ø Yes.....................................No

Ø No......................................Yes

Ø Maybe.................................No

Ø We need...............................I want

Ø I am sorry.............................You'll be sorry

Ø We need to talk......................You're in trouble

Ø Sure, go ahead........................You better not

Ø Do what you wan t...................You will pay for this later

Ø I am not upset........................Of course, I am upset, you moron!

Ø You're attentive tonight............Is sex all you ever think about?


Dictionary for Decoding Men's English:


Ø I am hungry...........................I am hungry

Ø I am sleepy............................I am sleepy

Ø I am tired..............................I am tired

Ø Nice dress..............................Nice cleavage!

Ø I love you..............................Let's have sex now

Ø I am bored.............................Do you want to have sex?

Ø May I have this dance?..................I'd like to have sex with you..

Ø Ca n I call you sometime?..............I'd like to have sex with you.

Ø Do you want to go to a movie?......I'd like to have sex with you.

Ø Can I take you out to dinner?........I'd like to have sex with you.

Ø I don't think th ose shoes go with that outfit..............I'm gay.