It is strange how the view of the world changes when you think you are gravely ill.
I find myself daydreaming about long vacations on the beach and driving really fast sports cars.
Other things in my life fall under a closer scrutinising eye. Am I happy? Will I be able to be happy for the rest of my life in my current situation? How long will I live? One year or 60 more?
Happiness is almost like a mythical unicorn when you are in the day to day grind.
I have found it easier to ponder life changing events.
What would I have done differently? Would I have been nicer to people if I would had known that my life may possibly be cut short?
I am looking at things in a whole new light.
Sometimes it takes a startling realization to force people to return to who they really are. Not a job title or a paycheck or social status.
I have not found out anything definite, but when I do, I will share it.
Nothing is in stone. Life is what you make of it. So, have a little fun, no matter how much time you have left on this earth.
Monday
Changes
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6 comments:
Did I miss something? Hope you are ok. I've got some thoughts on this subject, but will hold off till I hear more.
There is that moment...
Go to the beach, it isn't so very far away.
I spent years looking for the unicorn. Last year I had that moment... No one knew. I was alone with it.
When the answer came, I was relieved, but not so much as I would have expected. The reprise was only for now. The reward for 10 days of waiting was forever knowing that this very moment is the only moment.
Get in that sports car, go the beach. It really isn't so very far away...
My heart, all of our hearts, will travel quietly with you.
You sound like you're hurting. Like Hammer, I think I missed something.
Did you get some bad news?
I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this. I hope you don't have to wait too long to hear something definite, and when that time comes I hope that it's good news.
Yes, I know that some of you are wondering about what is going on in my world. In short, I have been sick for some time now. I am unable to explain what is going on right at this moment. This is a public place. I have not told either sets of my parents yet. I am waiting for test results that are due in by this upcoming wed. I will let you all know more then. Thanks for all the kind words and thoughts.
good luck, i hope things turn out for the best
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